Hey Leaders!
For ages, being totally wiped out has just been seen as “part of the job” in leadership. We talk about early mornings, late nights, and constantly traveling like it’s some kind of entry fee. But since 2020, things have seriously changed.
The whole pandemic thing stretched us leaders thin in ways we never imagined. That constant chaos—the volatility, uncertainty, complexity, and ambiguity (VUCA)—is no longer a temporary “change management” project; it’s the permanent backdrop to work. Everything moves faster, the pressure is relentless, and expectations are through the roof. I hear from leaders all the time who are regularly pulling 16-hour days or jetting across the globe for just a 72-hour meeting sprint.
Fatigue isn’t a temporary “busy season” anymore; it’s the default setting for way too many leaders, who sometimes even wear it like a badge of honor. But here’s the truth: being tired kills effectiveness and engagement. It’s a silent, constant tax on our ability to lead and perform.
The Hidden Tax: When Pushing Too Hard Costs You
I’ve been there! I went back to grad school while raising three kids and running my business. I quickly learned what running on empty feels like. I literally remember writing a paper in a hotel bathroom at 4 a.m. just so I didn’t wake my daughter! Years later, I was flying back and forth to help my parents downsize while dealing with business and supporting my family through a sudden health crisis.
When all that finally settled, the joy had just quietly drained out of my life. My days looked less like vibrant color and more like black and white. Everything felt like a chore. I wasn’t depressed, but I was completely depleted. I knew I had to refuel before I could even begin to rebuild. It’s an easy trap to get stuck in, but I made sure I didn’t.
That’s what extreme fatigue does: it’s a silent tax that slowly drains all your resources, chipping away at your well-being, your performance, and your leadership chops.
Here’s a crazy fact: Studies show that when you’ve been awake for about 17–24 hours, your brain and motor skills are performing as if your blood alcohol content is at the level of being legally intoxicated (between .05% and .10%)! Think about how many “buzzed” leaders are making huge, critical decisions every single day!
We might think we’re just toughing it out, but really, we’re just piling up debt.
Why We Need to Stop Glorifying Tiredness
A lot of leaders confuse being exhausted with having “grit” or being totally committed. Or they just think they have no other choice. They tell themselves, “It’ll be fine once I get past this busy stretch.”
But what if the “other side” doesn’t exist? What if this crazy pace is just the new normal for the rest of our careers? We risk more than just groggy mornings.
Positive psychology research tells us that energy is what expands our possibilities. Fatigue shrinks them. A tired leader doesn’t just feel bad; they make smaller, safer, more risk-averse decisions and miss chances that a fully engaged leader would jump on.
Even worse, sustained exhaustion leads straight to burnout, and burnout is the fast track to disengagement. Research shows that people who are experiencing high emotional exhaustion are much more likely to plan on quitting their job within the next few years. We simply cannot afford to lose momentum or run ourselves into the ground.
The solution is to ditch the endless grind and find a better rhythm—one that renews both our drive and our joy.
🚀 Flourish Mode: Refuel and Reset
Flourishing isn’t about simply doing less work. It’s about choosing activities that truly refill your energy tank and reset your perspective.
Sleep is essential, but it’s only one type of rest. You need variety! Renewal can come from savoring a happy moment, taking a walk outside, exercising, playing, spending time with friends, or getting lost in music or a good book.
For me, the ultimate reset is my annual vacation by the sea. That wide-open horizon, the rhythm of the waves, the crisp air—it fixes me up like nothing else. That’s my “big rest.”
But flourishing isn’t just about one big trip a year. It’s about a consistent cadence. Here’s an example of what that rhythm looks like:
- Hope (Twice a year): Deliberately reflecting on where I’ve been and envisioning where I’m headed.
- Drive (Daily): Focused energy applied to my work.
- Micro-rest (Twice a day): Short breaks, like meditating or stepping outside for just a few minutes.
- Day of Rest (2-4 times a month): One totally unstructured day where I get to decide what I want to do. (Even if it ends up being chores, the freedom to choose is restorative!)
- Big Rest (Once a year): A real vacation in an expansive natural place (like the forest or the ocean).
The main idea is this: We might feel infinite, but we are definitely renewable.
💡 Practical Check-Ins for Leaders
Here’s how to recognize when your tank is getting dangerously low:
- You’re sleeping less than 7–8 hours for more than three days straight.
- You’re skipping your workouts.
- You don’t have enough quality time for the people you love.
- Even your “peak” working times feel sluggish instead of energetic.
- Your patience is gone, and you’ve lost your sense of humor.
- You feel less optimistic, and your creativity is blocked.
And here are simple steps to start flourishing:
- Schedule micro-rests into every day.
- Build one totally unstructured day into your schedule each month.
- Take time for a major reset (vacation) every year.
- Reflect on your long-term vision regularly to regain perspective.
Flourishing leaders don’t just survive the pace of work; they rise above it. By intentionally building in recovery and recalibration, they sustain their energy, expand their impact, and become great leaders. These practices aren’t “taking a break from leading”; they’re the core of becoming a great leader.
When you refuel, you renew your energy, regain your perspective, and reclaim your momentum. That powerful renewal is what fuels the creativity, innovation, and lasting performance needed to create what truly matters at work and in life.
